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Tuesday, January 23rd, 2007
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4:54 pm - Halifax adventure!
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This Friday was quite eventful. Chrissy and I are frantically searching for a ride to Halifax. We had 3 rides lined up in case one or two of them bailed, and guess what? All 3 bailed. Hop in random guy's car, have a yarn with him, "Hey man you wanna go to the city?" "Sure," so we're on our way to Hali. We're planning to stay with Adam Nelson, Chrissy's ex-love thing. We get to his place, and he's not there. So no big deal, we venture to Tim Barager's- Chrissy's new love thing. Hang out, watch a movie, yadda yadda... back to Adam's, spark up a j and meet him and Anson. Nice fun people! I was half figuring we'd end up at some random stupid guy's house but noppppe... they're cool shit. Uhh... I think the next night I ended up drunk and puking in the bathroom but I can't really remember which day that was. Next day, go to Tim's again... we got food somewhere in this mess... some more grass... a movie with Anson? And then Monday, I sat around and played Wii all day with Adam because Chrissy went to see Tim and I got stuck at Adam's, but fun fun. Haha, and then me and Chrissy went to a video store for chips, and the place got robbed, it was fucking hilarious. The trip was quite dramatic, what with Chrissy complaining constantly about the cold and Adam randomly starting to like her again and then she's with Tim. Haha. Uhh... I can't think of anything else...
I watched a fuckload of cool movies, some of which follow:
The Thing
Last House On The Left
Jesus' Son
True Romance
current mood:  crazy
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| Tuesday, January 16th, 2007
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9:53 pm
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Yeah so. My life lately, fucking sucks. Do you wanna hear all the shit?
I've lost my morals. Oh, fuck yes, I can't distinguish between right and wrong when it comes to sex and sex-related activities anymore.
I liked someone, got loaded, and made a complete asshole of myself. Twice. While loaded. And the worst part is? I know for a fact he was starting to like me, and I fucked it up.
I'm beginning to learn that most people I hang out with, and get along with, hate me. Or can't stand me, or talk shit about me. Or just plain don't want to be around me.
My period's like a month late.
My grades have all dropped by about 15 points.
I got caught for skipping school today.
I lost Kyle.
Mom's pissed off.
I'm constantly stoned or drunk.
Enough for you?... and here we are again, fucking depressed. I tell you what, if all this shit keeps going wrong, I'm just gonna OD and pull a Shannon, River, Kurt, whatever you wanna call it. Accidental/premeditated OD, that's the way to go out.
It's better to burn out, than to fade away.
Of course.
current mood:  depressed
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| Monday, January 15th, 2007
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6:38 pm - WEEKEND at Alyssa's!
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This weekend was bomb. I've been in Pubnico like all week, as I think I already posted... so Wednesday, we start planning a party at Alyssa's, and on Friday we decide to invite lots of people. So, on a free class, Tammy and I decide to make some flyers, and hand them out. Well it worked, there was a fuckload of fun people there, including some cockknockers ahaha. Anyway, good old night, a fight between Justin and Trevor, Sam puking, Mike throwing crackers, me losing my pint and then realizing I drank a quart. And the next night, Shawn, Trevor and Kev came over to Alyssa's with me, Tammy, Jenn, Mike and Sammy. Strip poker! AND I WON :O. Big shock. Anyway, awesome times...
current mood:  (BURNT!!)
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| Thursday, January 11th, 2007
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11:01 pm - Francois' Camp
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So I just got back from Francois' camp... sorry about the last entry, I had mittens on and I was speeding. Haha. Anyway, it was a fun night, Francois, Courtney, Kyle, Shawn, Gav, Alyssa, Mike, Sammy, Anne, Tammy and me all drunked up chillen out... FUN. I love drunks on Thursday nights <33. It was pretty calm, Shawn didn't try to saw his leg off this time haha. I'll post later, I'm tired, going to Alyssa's tomorrow night for a barn party!! PUMPED!!
current mood: drunk
current music: Grillz!!
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6:14 pm
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at the moment i have really thick mittens on. so its hard to type. so im not gonna bother. im hbihg. and im going to a camp with my gopod best friend tammy. and anne and mike and sammy and gav and shawn and kyle and alyssa. it's gonna be fuin. were gonn... uhmm... sit around and p[lay mario. and, drink, and smoek, and do other fun things that teenagers do unsupervised. uhmm. thats it. love you
current mood:  high
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| Wednesday, January 10th, 2007
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6:26 pm
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The last couple days, have been eventful. Hanging out with Tammy again, randomly, not that it's a bad thing. It's pretty awesome actually. We went to Alyssa's one night, and fucking soberass Tammy (NEVER drinks) drank some mango rum and like half a cold shot, we all shared some more rum, uhm... I can't really remember things because a fuckload of hydro was shared as well. But, it was a fucking bomb night. Shawn, Kyle (Trevor's older brother), Miah and Gav, Justin, Joel and Evan were all there. Alyssa is madly in love with Gav, and Miah was trying to get down my pants all night. (Tammy's too). So it was pretty fuckin hilarious, especially when Shawn got piss drunk and tried to strangle himself so Joel slapped him. And Shawn bled all over the floor, and then came in carrying a pink Barbie suitcase he found somewhere in Alyssa's barn and sang the Barbie Girl theme song, not to mention flipping over a shitload of chairs and drinking mouthwash all night. Aaaand... can't really think of anything else, except when the lights went out for a sec and when they came back on Kyle had his shirt off randomly. Haha. Anyway, people are here. Update later.
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| Sunday, January 7th, 2007
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11:53 am - !
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So last night. Kev and Dave picked me and Megan up, we rip around with 4 quarts of champagne, get a buzz on. Go to Ashley's party, in honor of Frank's Birthday (HAPPY FRANK DAY, lmao) and omfg. omfg. It was an awesome night, hahaha. We ended up with some coconut rum and yeah, tons of people there, good old time dancing to the gangsta boogie!... Unfortunately, Ashley's b/f Jer Muise decides it will be fun to go for a rip. Drunk. He leaves Ashley's driveway, 160 clicks, meets the end of her road, which meets the other road... like this
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OTHER ROAD
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Anyway. Guardrail on the other side, he just misses it and flies 40 ft. into the ditch. He's fine, his brand new fucking Jetta that he had for 3 days with the mirror ripped off and the whole front end smashed. Other than that, a-1 party. Loved it.
current mood: giggly
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| Saturday, January 6th, 2007
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12:38 pm - Another night at the camp.
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So last night, me and Megan went for a lovely trip to Kev's camp in Argyle. Kev and Dave picked us up, we got 8 FXs, chugged em, got to the camp, chugged 4 more and a cooler... ended up an awesome night. That's all I'm posting, haha.
Mildred and HEATHER!! <33333
current mood: enthralled
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| Friday, January 5th, 2007
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12:18 am - afasdfagfrh
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So I've decided... or learned, or figured out...
1. You cannot trust anyone you haven't known well. Seriously. As stupid as that sounds, the minute you begin to trust a stranger, you are FUCKED because you never see what's coming.
2. When this happens, and you end up fucked over, the best thing to do is get over it. Stop bitching, stop whining, and suck it the fuck up. Don't even act like you care. Because you know what that gets you? SHIT ALL.
3. My emotions change, daily. I can't make up my mind. What do I want, where do I want to go, who do I want to hang out with. If I want to quit drugs, if I want to like, pursue... acting? ANYTHING that takes any thought, I can't decide. So I can promise you this, if I love you today, it might change tomorrow. Take the days as they come, and cherish every moment. See, it's all gonna fuck up. Everything does. But it gets better, and you meet new people, and you make new memories.
4. Appreciate the sunsets. Holy fucking shit. I saw an awesome one today.
current mood: crazy
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| Monday, January 1st, 2007
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12:19 pm - New Year's.
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My New Year's Eve... consisted of waking up next to Kyle <33, Kyle MacDonald coming over and waking us up at like 10 a.m., blah blah, toke toke, Jake and Steve coming over, toke toke, drive with Josh... back to the house, me and Matt and Kyle take off to Liverpool, cause Kyle has work tomorrow. Drop him off, drive back for what honestly seemed like a good 6 hours... Anne's party! OMFG... what a night. People crying, people macking, people dancing and screaming the lyrics, it was a fucking sweet party, like the best one I've been to in months... the New Year started off with me, Chrissy, Evan and Jake all exchanging kisses and drunkenly screaming Happy New Year... Matt somewhere in the background "AND GO FUCK YOURSELF", hahaha. Christ, awesome party.
And today, Kyle was supposed to come back up, but due to his dad constantly calling and telling my mom I take dope and I'm just gonna lay around my whole life, now he's not allowed? Meh. Smoke a j, and everything will be okay.
current mood:  drained
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| Saturday, December 30th, 2006
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7:50 pm - HOLY SHIT.
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So Kyle is here with me, and that is fucking mint. We just went for a lovely adventure to... the Ultramar? With Josh Muise and Jake Kishbaugh. It was fuckin sweet... an awesome joint, like 2 pp long, and 2 pp wide... nuts. Anyway. We ended up almost going in the ditch like 20 times because Josh thinks he's a big man, so he has to swerve all over the road. I hate winter. So then we go to Evan's, and he's pissy, and we gave him grass and it made him happy. Driving home, we meet... a car in the ditch... and it's Jess, Steph, Kate and Brad. WTF. They're stuck in the ditch, but Josh of course pushes them out. LMAO.
current mood: drunk
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| Thursday, December 28th, 2006
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9:00 pm - Update.
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I've decided, my New Year's Resolutions are...
1. Get my grades back up to the mid-90s.
2. Stop branching out socially, stick to a small friend circle. Less drama.
3. Build my relationship with Kyle.
4. Learn about Satanism.
| The Nirvana Survey | | I'm bored | | What do you think of Nirvana?: | They're a band. | | Who is your favorite Nirvana member?: | That's a stupid question. | | Who do you think was the most talented Nirvana member?: | I think they were all equal. | | Your answer to the last 2 don't have to be the same! | | On a scale from 1 to 10 (10 highest) how would you rate yourself as a fan?: | 8 | | How would you rate your Nirvana knowledge?: | 8 | | Do you only know a few songs?: | No. | | Do you know pretty much every Nirvana song ever written?: | Yes. | | Do you know all of the members names from 1994?: | Yes. | | What are they? First AND last please.: | Kurt Cobain, Dave Grohl, Krist Novoselic. | | Now let's see if you really do know anything about Nirvana. | | Who's the baby on the Nevermind CD?: | Spencer Elden. | | What's Nirvana's first album?: | Bleach. | | What year did Nirvana become a band? (NOT THE YEAR OF THEIR FIRST ALBUM!): | 1987. | | What's the acoustic album called?: | Unplugged In New York. | | What artist(s) did Nirvana do covers from on that album?: | Let's see... Meat Puppets, David Bowie... umm... | | Who is Curt Kirkwood?: | Meat Puppets. | | What is Kurt's daughter's name?: | Frances Bean. | | Who is Pat Smear?: | He recorded some early shit for Nirvana. | | Name one unreleased track.: | Talk To Me. | | What's the boxed set called?: | With The Lights Out. | | What's Dave Grohl's middle name?: | Eric. | | What's Krist Novoselic's middle name?: | Anthony. | | Who was Nirvana's original drummer?: | Chad Channing. | | What did Kurt Cobain wear to Headbanger's ball?: | A ball gown, hahaha. | | Did you know that the song "Marigold" is not really by NIRVANA?: | Uh. Kind of. | | Who is it really by?: | I thought it was by Dave. lmao. | | I admit, those previous 2 are kind of trick questions. | | Do you own at least 4 Nirvana albums?: | All of them. | | Fun/easy section | | How many posters do you have?: | Hmm... one is up now but I've got a few more. | | What are your five favorite songs?: | Sappy, Pay To Play, Serve The Servants, ... I like them all! | | What is your favorite album?: | Hormoaning. | | How many DVDs do you have?: | One. | | Have you ever seen Nirvana in concert? (probably not): | Christ, I wish. | | Have you ever met anyone who was ever in Nirvana? (probably not): | No. | | The End I guess. Trivia is more fun than these questions.: | Haha, fo sho. | Take this survey | Find more surveys
Bzoink - The Original Survey Site |
current mood:  content
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8:04 pm - Pshh, whatev.
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So recent discoveries tell me that, Shawn, the guy I was seeing, has a girlfriend from far away named Amber something and that he has been macking all over Tammy. Thank GOD I kicked her out, hahaha. Anyway, that's all good. Because I am back with Kyle, and I am pumped for it. The first day we saw each other in what? 6 months? was just like old times, nothing had changed a bit. We walked around in the woods, in the rain, for a good 2 hours. Gotta love it.
So I'm still in Liverpool, and hanging out with Doodle for a while has made me SO much happier. Saw the old boys! 2pac, Rupert... awhh, it's been a-1.
But soon, I have to go back to Tusket. Blah. And back to school, and back to my routine boring passionless life. Math assignments. Other assorted dull stuff. But at least, I can see Chrissy and Matt and Kyle Mac... only people that aren't pissing me off lately.
current mood:  cranky
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| Monday, December 25th, 2006
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4:10 pm - Xmas
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Did I ever tell you how much I hate Christmas? A pointless holiday. People use the excuse of Jesus's birthday to spend countless dollars on stupid presents. Read the Bible, you'll see that nobody even knows when Jesus's birthday is. And WTF is with this Santa shit? Where did this come in? UGH. People are ghey. I keep getting all these pointless gifts so I think I'm just going to sell them all on eBay. I wish money was given out instead, then I'd have smoke/FX/grass money.
Anyway, I haven't posted in a while. Nothing new really... I've been hanging out with Shawn like every night at his place or out partying or whatever, I went to his place one night, and to Kev's camp another night, ended up taking care of Trevor after he shot 3/4 of his quart of rum. Haha.
Uhh... still talking to Kyle, still trying to figure out what to do. I hate how we're finally so much better with no fighting but he's so far away. Maybe that's why we're not fighting, haha.
Tonight and tomorrow night I'm stuck at dad's, in order to get presents and what not. Yay. So, hopefully I'll get to see Kyle.
Blahhh... no wonder there are so many suicides around the holidays.
current mood:  blah
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| Friday, December 22nd, 2006
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12:30 pm - Mhm.
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My last 2 nights have been very very mucho dramatic.
Wednesday night, me and Chrissy were planning to have a little party at my place. We're upping... *that's code for things I can't write about*. Tyler C calls, "What are you guys doing?" We cancel the party, and he picks us up with Corey Smith and Shawn, we venture to Pubnico to Tyler's, and meet up with Trevor Nickerson and his woman Sam. Drunk on! What a fucked up night... Mario, horses, Dickface-- me and Corey's love child, haha, we're up all night, me and Sam yarning about shit in the bathroom hahaha... then we venture to Shawn's and watch porn. Of course, something always has to happen to cause drama. Tyler got smashed, saw Chrissy, and it was "Love at first sight", to use his words. Basically, it was him all over her all night and me and her casting weirded-out glances at each other. It ended up in her completely having to tell him, basically, to fuck off, and for some reason it offended him? Yeap.
So last night, again, another drunk on with Trevor, Shawn and Tyler. Shawn and Trevor went home and slept and Tyler got drunk and yelled until 3:30 a.m.
So now I'm home, and planning to head back to Argyle for a party at Kev's camp with my main bitch Megan tonight! Cannot fucking wait. Ash, Anne and Jer should come over too... yah. Hah.
And as for me and Kyle, I honestly don't know. The pills, the drugs, the liquor, and the distance seem to just be intervening. I didn't feel so bad till the sun went down, then I come home, no one to wrap my arms around. Jack White wrote that, and I'm feeling it, because I'm happy to be with him, but he's too far. Maybe love isn't enough, but hah. Who said it's love, how do I know what love is? There's also another guy kind of in the picture now... but... I'm not sure.
current mood: crazy
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| Tuesday, December 19th, 2006
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8:47 pm - XR, again.
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My day has been a-fucking-1.
I planned last night to skip school today.
I wake up at 1, play some Diner Dash, wait for Kyle to get off school, talk to him. Shower, makeup, dressed, hair... to Chrissytina's.
The minute I walk in the door, Chrissy is again in her underwear and a tank top. She hands me a water bottle, and a pill.
Now, here I am, 5 hours later, speeding, speeding...
camming with Kyle...
drawing rainbows, playing on Gaia.
Darby's on his way home, he's calling us soon, we plan to hang out with him, Logan, Ben and Evan.
This night, is gonna be sweet.
current mood: wired
current music: Mouth - Bush
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1:53 pm - What Would You Do?
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Kyle's not coming up today, but I am headed to Wedgeport to see my bestest buddy Christy Nikki. We plan to
-- venture to Darby's or vice versa to hang out with Ben, Loga, Darby and Evan.
Yay!
It should be fun...
but if Kyle was here, it would be better.
Jesus.
current mood: drained
current music: My Love - Justin Timberlake and T.I.
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| Monday, December 18th, 2006
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5:24 pm - Today.
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Started out boring-- became awesome! As usual, didn't feel like getting up, but I did. And happy that I did, for I have now met Logan Morton and he is cool shit. Haha. Planning to-- go for a ride with Matt whenever he shows up, come back here, crash. Out with Ashley and Megan and the ladies tomorrow, then to Chrissy's to venture over to Darby's to see a bunch of fun people. THE NEXT DAY -- I shall have a small party, I do believe.
I can't wait.
I'm actually excited, and determined for once. I feel like I'm on an upper or something...
Are these feelings that normal people have all the time? Haha.
current mood: PUMPED, niggaaaa
current music: What You Know - T.I.
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| Sunday, December 17th, 2006
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7:00 pm - Weekend.
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This weekend, is a blur. Last night, I remember Ashley picking me up, picking Anne and Jeremy up... drive... smoke... toke... drive... for about 6 hours straight. Meet Matt up the road, buy beer, begin driving. Matt gets hammered, me and Jer are freaking out, Trevor wants to drive, Shawn and Tyler are laughing their asses off because they think we're gonna rack up. Anyway, we get back to Tyler's with a 24, 4 FX's, and another 12 beer. Commence more drinking... a hazy moment... Matt puking out the window and puking all over Tyler's mattress. Matt passing out, and puking, and pissing all over the walls and himself. Lovely. Justin calls, "Let's go to a camp..." Justin shows up, we jump in his Trans Am and take off to Francois' camp in East Pubnico (I think?)... Shawn and Tyler fighting with axes and chainsaws, Mario, Evan T on the set yelling shit at old Pubnicoers... walking for half an hour through the woods (THANKS TO TREVOR, grr), back to Tyler's around 3 a.m., we wake up Matt and he drives to town which is exactly 43 km away, to get cigarettes from the all-night Irving, and me and Jer pass out.
What a fucking fun night.
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| Friday, December 15th, 2006
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8:13 pm - Love Me Or Hate Me--
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Ahh.. It's 8:13 on a Friday night and I'm home, and it feels freakin nice. Haha. I got picked up with Jer by Ashley at 2, drove around for 5 hours getting wrecked out of our faces, now I just wanna curl up with a book and some food and crash.
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